tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post771812978131931126..comments2023-10-17T00:54:13.256-07:00Comments on Kitchen-Table Learners: I'm Only Human -- and So is ThomasFrankiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02443594220588498332noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-91209121125128552572007-11-26T11:12:00.000-08:002007-11-26T11:12:00.000-08:00((hugs))I can feel your pain,we know better,but in...((hugs))<BR/>I can feel your pain,we know better,<BR/>but in times of great stress we often fall back into the habits of how we<BR/>were parented (is that even a word?)<BR/>instead of how we know we should parent. Be kinder to yourself, you apologized, and need to move on.Garden State Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10990374136605207993noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-9312799683211705842007-11-26T01:42:00.000-08:002007-11-26T01:42:00.000-08:00Hugs my dear! We have all had those not so shinin...Hugs my dear! We have all had those not so shining moments. The difference is that we recognize them and apologize for it,unlike our parents ever did. I try my hardest to get the same point across with a quiet but firm voice, but I am not always able to find if quickly enough and sometimes the kids get the knee-jerk reaction. THem seeing me work through it helps them try to do the same when Angelahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04016672238795146767noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-16889553971456724952007-11-24T11:41:00.000-08:002007-11-24T11:41:00.000-08:00Frankie, I called Beeze a smart ass a few days ago...Frankie, I called Beeze a smart ass a few days ago. Ok, so he was one. But he didn't really know what it meant but he knew me using "ass" couldn't be good.<BR/><BR/>You make up and go on.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-81828453644790189462007-11-24T06:24:00.000-08:002007-11-24T06:24:00.000-08:00I had a post almost exactly like this except my mo...I had a post almost exactly like this except my moment of meanness was over school work. <BR/><BR/>http://daybydayhsing.blogspot.com/2007/05/when-youre-bitch.html<BR/><BR/>I think I'll just echo everyone else. We break sometimes and it isn't horrible if sometimes our kids see that so they can realize they're dealing with people that have their limits.Dawnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05895897568006441289noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-49427274209286862062007-11-23T19:58:00.000-08:002007-11-23T19:58:00.000-08:00As Bob Newhart says, "STOP IT!!!""JUST STOP IT!"Fr...As Bob Newhart says, "STOP IT!!!"<BR/><BR/>"JUST STOP IT!"<BR/><BR/>Frankie, *every* mother has moments like that.<BR/><BR/>You're right, the key thing was that you calmed down and apologized. Don't worry about earning his trust back. At least, not any more than he has to worry about earning yours. (The whole ugly scene began with his yelling rant.)<BR/><BR/> I think it's important that he Hhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12947420124918584822noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-5413755565261845862007-11-23T13:17:00.000-08:002007-11-23T13:17:00.000-08:00I am really impressed with the fact that you could...I am really impressed with the fact that you could talk to Thomas about the blow up. Holidays are stressful for all of us. Sometimes we blow it momentarily--but then, if we talk about what happened, we make our kids more resilient.<BR/>I think in the past, parents like yours and mine, felt that they had project that they were right about everything they did, so they never told us how they felt Elisheva Hannah Levinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16061377724926154037noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-4239119423301727022007-11-23T07:28:00.000-08:002007-11-23T07:28:00.000-08:00I'm sorry that you channeled your mom in dealing w...I'm sorry that you channeled your mom in dealing with Thomas. <BR/><BR/>As for the age he's at and what comes of it, I can tell you that I went through this with Boy and am now dealing with it with Girl. She's a whole lot worst than he was (or so it seems to me). The only thing keeping me going day to day is the knowledge that one day, when he was about 14 or 15, Boy just decided to change howMeg_Lhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02159066444833263067noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-11988882883969841382007-11-23T07:06:00.000-08:002007-11-23T07:06:00.000-08:00I agree with Bonnie and Heather, the big differenc...I agree with Bonnie and Heather, the big difference is that you recognized what you had done, took responsibility, and tried to make right. One day, Thomas will blow up at someone, then he will remember how it felt to have it happen to him, and he will know what to do to try and fix it. I think it is a valuable lesson for all of us. I still think you are a great mom, even if you channel the less Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-13014756926851994652007-11-23T05:27:00.000-08:002007-11-23T05:27:00.000-08:00Thanks for sharing. I, too, have had a similar exp...Thanks for sharing. I, too, have had a similar experience this week. I'm so glad I'm not the only one. Kids are forgiving. I think the best thing we can do is to talk it out with them, point out the good and bad of what has happened. Everyone has days when they are irritated, frustrated, overwhelmed. My mom never told us what was going on. We were just expected to get over whatever upset was Bonnihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12823321141183113841noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20147563.post-72360536914464441342007-11-23T00:39:00.000-08:002007-11-23T00:39:00.000-08:00Thomas will be fine. I've had similar outbursts t...Thomas will be fine. I've had similar outbursts that reminded me of my mother and scared the crap out of me. The difference, that my mother never did, was the apology after, the discussion about MUTUAL respect, and the fact that my outbursts are few and far between. We talk about stress, and respect, and expectations for THEM and for ME, and how nobody's perfect.<BR/><BR/>Being one step closerHeatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12463371508970237621noreply@blogger.com